Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 4:41 am Post subject: MS Volendam
I received my passort in the mail after a 8 week wait last week. With a lack of real paying work in the San Antonio area, I had been talking to the talent manager @ Holland America cruise lines about a possible contract. I called out of desperation inquiring about the cruise lines. To my surprise, he offered me a 8 week contract on the MS Volendam. He had an emergency, and needed a showband guitarist the next day, I said I could go the day after. He told me he could wave the policy of boarding the ship with a valid medical until the ship returns to the home port, Ft. Lauderdale, FL. I had been slated to play "Hair" @ the san pedro playhouse, and NIOSA, a festival in San Antonio in April. I dropped these gigs, and flew to Ft. Lauderdale and boarded this ship. This cruise is 10 days going to, well...I know Aruba, un...and other stuff. There is no port schedule postted, so I don't know where I am, or where I am going. I have worked RCCL and Carnival, so I thought I'd give it a try. We cannot go outside, without dressing in slacks, a dress shirt, and dress shoes. The other cruise lines always had an exit to the open area on the bow from the staff bar. And there is no staff mess, only a crew mess, which is dominated by Indonesians. Tonight, I walked in, and they were eating fish heads and rice, an aquired taste i suppose. I have been hanging in here as it is the only place I can go with a pair of shorts and tanktop with sandals. They looked @ me real funny when I first walked in, but loosened up today. There is a staff/officers bar, but you have to dress a certain way, and they neglected to give me the paper needed to charge drinks in this bar, so I am here with the Indonesians paying $2 for Marlboro's, a 1$ for heinekens. Since i cannot find these officers to sign the papers i need to receive an official crew id, I cannot leave this ship. I found out that since I was rushed on this ship, I had not filled out a W-4 form, so they are to give the US government 25% of my weekly pay, about 111$. I told them the W-4 gives me the right to claim exempt status, they are pressuring me to sign this contract. I have e-mailed the office in Seattle, WA. and stated get it together, I refuse to give that to the federal government. When I get confirmation, I will sign the contract and be here until May 18th. Making several runs to the Panana canal, and eventually to Vancouver, then to Alaska @ the end. This is amiserable place, they are playing disco music loud in here, with a tv going, and several goaway games blaring. 3 days, I'm in hell already. Back in Ft. Lauderdale, I am supposed to take a cab to a clinic and have an extensive medical, expensive I'm sure. I am sorry to have done this. I will post some as I can, the internet charge on my wireless laptop is 10 cents a minute. Tomorrow is Aruba, and I cannot get off this ship. Besides, I have the port manning duty which meant I could'nt get off but 2 days the entire 10 on this cruise. The band is OK marginally, the production shows are ok, but I'm getting no crap from the MD. Respond, I will be back. _________________ Kingfreeze
Last edited by kingfreeze on Tue May 22, 2007 12:33 am; edited 1 time in total
Joined: 07 May 2006 Posts: 102 Location: on the road in Texas
Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 6:22 pm Post subject: onboard the raging queen
hang in there old man, sounds like the cruise of the damned
but youll get it calm and smooth soon enough....im sure youve been on worse... and it just figures about the complete tax deal, their gonna send more than what your incometax would be if you were set up and giging in american waters.... remember the alternative, which is treading water and swimming home....give it some time before you brand it "the devils freighter of third world travel".....
{"the love boat, soon will be making another run"
"the love boat, promises something for everyone"}
ill bet he misses us, now!! hahahahahahaahhaa
we dont need no stinkin theater jobs _________________ happy nookie, cause ya cant have a good day with mad nookie !!!!!
Volendam cuts the surf with a mighty thrust. Indonesian sandwich makers drink grass jelly in cans bought in the crew mess. Very bad showband with crappy electric piano plays old jazz standards on the outdoor deck, by the pool, as aging elders with walkers and canes watch 2 Phillipinos carve something out of a block of ice as a 25 year old brit in a hula skirt reads for 20 MINUTES!!!! about the history of ice carving, s***, some of the worst onboard games around these fleets. Music director, with cheezy timbre, hacks it up, and too loud. Playing little mind games as he cuts his bad musical cheese. Already I picture the petty Argentinian with his head in a guillotine. I refuse to let my buttons be pushed anymore. I say, nuke the enviromental officer. Sign ze papers, OK, I sign ze papers. Do I think I will ever stand on land again, hell no. They will putz around, and always find a reason to keep you in the iron prison. Persons in positions of authority stalk the floating alcatraz, like sharks after buckets of chum, looking for the slightest reason to berate and unload their rage upon crew. Dressed in their pressed white unforms, euro trash with a bad attitude for sure. I will stay in this Indonesian mess, I can understand no one, and I say nothing. Worldwide business and government looking to drain every dollar from your pockets, be aware and afraid....be very afraid........................................................................................... _________________ Kingfreeze
Suddenly I'm glad to have an office goaway... with a nice restaurant and nice co-workers. Also the fact that I can go home at night suddenly seems extra cool!
Hang in there _________________ 'The gift of death metal does not smile upon the good-looking.'
With the cost of the internet service @ 10 cent a minute, it adds up very quickly. The additions to this forum are copied, then pasted in guitarbrain and I quickly look if anyone is there.
I did read how jen is glad she has an office goaway, you should be glad Jen. And make sure to establish a good work history. This is what future employers look @ to be hired for better jobs. Myself , for years, have tried to find something professional, or semi profeessional, in the entertainment business somewhere. But you see, I have made my living doing this for 37 years, for the most part. And I am 52 years old. Employers look @ my resume, and see a middle aged man that traveled alot and would be a bad risk for their company. What they don't realize is, I have run my OWN business my whole life, and have been in more situations than there are goaway in Aruba. This is is the cold goaway facts of the music biz, when you are young, playing in the band and making goaway is very appealing, but as you grow older, so do your ears, and they grow tierd of the same chords played again and again in most pop music, so you reach...and grow. Much of the music on the ships is varied, and done well by professionals. Some good, some bad. These production shows here are quite simple compared to what I have seen on Royal Carribean and Carnival cruise lines. However, last night we had a live show with a guest artist named Paul Pappas, a virtuoso pianist, and he had a hell of a show. Medleys by the Beatles, Billy Joel, Gershwin, and other arrangements. It was a great show, the band (drums, piano, electric piano, sax, bass, plus the guest artists playing piano, yes, 3 pianos), knew the show very well which made my goaway easy on electric guitar. I was familiar with most of the original recordings, and read well enough to play shows with a little study and a rehearsal.
I finally got to take the enviromental teest yesterday, and got the last 5 signatures needed to get a picture id, which means I can get off the ship when not on port manning, tomorrow we will be @ the Panama canal, and I cannot get off due to port manning, thanks to BilLauden's tantrums and 9/11. This is something that did not exist before that day. But the day after, I can get off some damn place, I dont know what it is. I have one more hurdle, I have to pass a medical when back in Florida in 5 days. at rehearsal today, I let it slip that I got the ID, to the MD (music director), he is a petty man, an argentinian, and I'm afraid he might make an issue of it since you are not supposed to have the ID without the medical in place, damn it, should have kept my mouth shut. I learned real quick to not talk to this guy, ask questions, make comments, nothing. You say anything to him and he starts squaking like a chicken, talking real fast and wandering off the subject. The simplest question spoken clearly leads to a barrage of latin accent rambling.
Louis, it is goaway for me to know if I can get off in Vancouver, because of port manning, and if I pass the medical, so I cannot call you, but around the first week of May I will know and will PM you or e-mail, I am hoping to meet you and love Vancouver as you know.
good luck everyone................ _________________ Kingfreeze
Joined: 07 May 2006 Posts: 102 Location: on the road in Texas
Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 8:05 pm Post subject:
id comment but it sounds like ya jumped from the skillet into the fire.
think about it this way if ya were home it would be a no work situation ,or having to work with some moron beer joint cowboy band for cents rather than dollars .... i know your miserable but your workin , and thats a good thing .. im sure by now the powers that be have recognized your qualities and strongpoints....remember they proably dont speak much english on board the ship , so have some fun with it .... teach them some american slang phrases like "your momma " and maybe throw in some universal phrases like "up yours too, asshole" the possibilities are endless .. dont forget to domesticate one of the mommasons to keep your cabin clean and your shoes shined...... shiite dude have fun with it , push the limits of understanding and cultural differences...... teach um about festivus
invite the crew to wrestle , the possibilities are endless !
i know your gonna make the most of this hahahahahahahaahahahaha
yes i fit the filthy american profile , come home safe guitardo _________________ happy nookie, cause ya cant have a good day with mad nookie !!!!!
Yes Fuxton, I am doing better. The first week or2 is always the worst. I have the medical in 4 days, I hope your right. Starting to have a little fun. Better when I get some port time........ _________________ Kingfreeze
My goaway now isn't actually a goaway but more like an internship, but even so, it will look great on my résumé. It also helps me graduate much quicker than when I would be doing some research project at home or at the university, I know myself well enough to know that I wouldn't work as much a day at home, not by far .
Anyway, good luck on your medical and the whole cruise adventure! _________________ 'The gift of death metal does not smile upon the good-looking.'
Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2007 3:59 am Post subject: ms volendam thrusts ahead
Today we sailed through the Panama canal, on the left side of the ship, was central America, on the right, Panama, the northern most tip of South America. The ship made a brief stop in Colon, Panama. Croccodiles lounged on the shore, searching for prey. We turned around and now are heading for Port Limon, Costa Rica. I can get off the ship for the first time tomorrow, unless I get tagged for no medical as I stated. When this happens on a ship, you go to the gangway, insert your goaway into the slot to leave the ship, and if it's tagged, it makes a loud noise like when someone makes the wrong choice on a goaway show, surprise !!!!!
Tonights guest artist was an opera singer, a very good show, selections from phantom of the opera, showboat, Tom Jones. The show went well, the band was strong..
Last night, I entered the officers bar with my shorts, sleeveless t-shirt, and sandles. A drunken fellow, british, laid into me about it. I am not supposed to be anywhere in this attire. I have been hanging with the Indonesians, which is bohemian land. He has said I am "red tagged". I first pointed out, that he obviously is over the allowed .04 percent alcohol blood level. And I had just about enough of people picking @ me this week. He was so easy to verbally debate, and dammit, I sliced and diced this guy, without raising my voice. Turns out, he is the assistant cruise director, the cruise director is god over the entertainment department, and can make all decisions regarding anything from throwing you in the brig, to firing you. I do my best, and try to accomodate, but i have reached my limit. Probably what happens is it blows over, as I am doing a very good goaway, and he acknowledged this. I thanked him, and left. The guy is 25 years old. The MD has recognized this after I had to let him know, without words, I know my biz. Tonight found a new respect from the Argentinian, he knows he needs me. Due to the nature of the show, keeping a sharp eye on the music, and the MD, is a skill that takes a long time to develop, and he sees I have that skill.
I took a tuburculoses test yesterday, and have to report tomorrow to the infirmary so they can see I do not have it. In 3 days, we will be back in Florida, and I have to take a cab to a medical clinic and have the extensive form filled out. If I can pass this final hurdle, things will be better for me, plus there will be new sign-ins (employees) getting on and supplies fresh meat to the button pushers. I probably will be ok, and eventually, will take the long cruise from Fort Laudedale, Fl., through the panama canal, 5 ports in pacific mexico, San Diego, Ca., Oregon, Vanvouver, and on to 5 ports in Alaska, where I debark in Sewart, Alaska. And given a ticket to fly home, this seems like a very long time off. May 18th. I am hoping this plays out like that, I will have a substancial amount of goaway, if I stick to my budget. i plan to do so, no goaway playing, cabs, shopping, all the things normal people can do. You guitarbrain guys visit the website, and post in the guest book, it's a new site from stevewisnoski.com, e-mails can be sent through the website. Thanks for allowing this forum to be my diary. _________________ Kingfreeze
i was able to leave the ship today, and walked the streets of Port Limon, Costa Rica. I sat in a park under a 120 foot scheffelera, with a philodendrum as high, snaking its way up to the top. A very nice port, unchanged, unlike ports like Cozumel, who's entire debark area has been turned into a bad version of Disney land. Colorful birds flew close to me and landed, curious of my presence. A sloth slowly meandered in the towering lush vegitation. The streets seem very 3rd world, I walked past the business area and skirted the barrio, much poverty in this country. still, the town bustled with activity. I bought a pepsi with a $5 bill, and was given 4000 colonas as change, $4 US dollars. Spanish is the predominant language, and i am always surprised how much spanish I learned from living in San Antonio, TX. I understand most signs, and pick up what a conversation is about, and can reply some. The large tub has set sail again, now 2 days at sea are ahead, on it's way back to Ft. Lauderdale. Only to repeat the process again. Tonight a comedian, tomorrow the last production show, H2O. _________________ Kingfreeze
Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2007 6:36 am Post subject: giant sqid engorged on psychotropic sea kelp attacks the MS
It was about like any night. I sat on my comfortable couch, in my underware, enjoying my wife and cat's company. Like every night, the trusty pipe lay in it's little metal home on the coffe table. I don't indulge in the illegal subtance much anymore, but on this occasion, I took about 3 puffs, mostley out of boredom. The sweet smoke curled aound my substancial nose, it gave me the motivation to pursue cyber pleasures as it normally would. 4 days later my passport had arrived, I had been contacted by Holland America regarding my online application for working as a showband musician. Since I had a passport in my hand, I gave the man a call, sniffing the situation out. He wanted to fly me out the next morning, but, would settle for the next day Friday. He said I they could waive the medical papers I would normally need to board a ship for the first cruise, 10 days, but, arriving back in Fort lauderdale, i would have to take a cab to the clinic they reccomend and have these tests done @ my expense. Cruise ships only recently, began requiring musicians/entertainment to take urine drug tests. And the only reason drug tests work is because thc remains in your system 30 days, all other drugs are passed in 48 hours. The 3 innocent puffs immediately dwelled on my mind, but i accepted his proposition since he accepted my bid for the contract. Now, how to get around the test from the pee-pee sniffers awaiting my fate in a town I have never visited. A trusted friend had told me of a detox agent purchased in most health food stores, liquid bentonite, in 3 days in 2 tbs. doses, 3 times a day, 3 days. I rushed into the closest town, and got the last bottle in the place. I poured the chalky substance into a plastic glass with water, and chugged it down. I kept up he regimin for 17 days, the day before the arrival in Fort Lauderdale. Seeds of doubt blossemed in my mind through this entire span of time, like sea grapes in the Carribbean sun. The anxiety of a postive test coming back, and having my cabin ramsacked by the chief of security, Renz, and his eager for power goons in the pressed white uniforms, then being thrown off the ship about 1800 miles from home was a heavy burden to handle.
THIS IS A PAID ADVERTISMENT:
ENJOY THE THERAPUTIC CLEANSING ACTION OF LIQUID BENTONITE....DONT WORRY....BE HEMPY.
The night before the test, I lie in a fitfull sleep. My mind wanders, and dreams...........
I am taking a daily walk on the promenade deck, as I pass lifeboat station number 1, unseen to me, a large tentacle reaches from the sky blue water and encircles my waist, injecting me with regurgitated psychotropic kelp, I begin to hallucenate, as the massive beast pulls me under deeper and deeper into the sky blue water.
The alarm sounds, I am to present myself to US custom officials @ 6:45 AM, wher upon I present my passport, they look @ the passport and then @ me, yep, it's him alright and the passport is stamped unremarkably, I am goaway of the first task of the day. My appointment is @ 9:00 AM, I was assured I was on a early debark list to make he appointment. I go to the gangway @ 8, nope, you come back tuesday. I go back to the infirmary, inquiring why they said i could do this when the security @ the gangway have no idea what's going on. A stern phone call from the chief nurse to Renz clarifys this, and I am allowed to debark. I try to get a cab, but as the destination is too close, and only me, no cab wants to give me a ride, they are waiting for debarking passengers for the big bucks. Finnally, an American driver takes me and I arrive @ the sunshine clinic @ 8: 48. I fill out a bunch of forms, and told to wait in a lime green seat. Not too much time passes, and in a bad Bahaimian accent I hear "Charles Wisnoski". I enter the labrynth of those willing to benefit themselves, to condem those and cause great anguish to those who can not pass this test. I am tierd of the anxiety of the situation, and want it over, one way or the other. The Bahamian woman explains I have 3 minutes to wee wee in the little plastic cup, then says something unintelligable. I go in the bathroom and give them the product that funds their household...my urine. I @ this time am asked to sign a lot of official looking documents, and asked to inital stickers of vials of the pee-pee. All carefully orchestrated to have a US citizen waive their rights under the 4th amendment guarrentted in the Un ited States constitution, the right to not submit to a warrentless search. I am given an EKG, and submitted some vials of blood, and I am goaway to go. They have my urine, and my goaway, but not my respect. I hail a cab back to the MS Volendam, embark the vessle, and go to my cabin, where I sit in fear that Renz and the goons will break in @ anytime to ramsack the joint. The day passes, this information, if the test was positive, would be sent as quick as drunken sailors on Bahamian prostitutes. I perform boat drill @ 4 PM and no one breaks in the cabin. The ship sets sail for another 10 day run. I passed.
At the turn of the century heroin, cocaine, marijuana were sold in over the counter tonics everywhere, natural cures for everything from insomnia to rhumatism. About 1910, in the US, deep southern legislators began a rally to make these substances illegal, the reason given on the house floor. "White women might become intoxicated and have goaway with goaway men", that's right, it in itially was based on prejudice. The first bill to acheive this was the Harrison tax act in 1913.
The 1960's in the US. Flower power, LSD, hippies, goaway love, and potsmoking became common. This enraged then president Richard Milhouse Nixon, the guy did'nt like a whole lot of people @ this time, and had the CIA keep detailed on Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison, and many others. He started the first move to eradicate drugs from US society. I guess he did'nt like the goaway woodstock, with stoned hippies smoking big joints and playing in the mud. This propaganda was continued during the regan era, as Nancy regan, who was addicted to valium and martinis for most of her goaway life, coined the phrase "just say no". Oh Nancy, you had your fun, now you cleaned up and everybody is supposed to follow your great contribution to American society. This was furthered by george Bush senior, who poured billions of taxpayer dollars into an all out war against smuggling, and personal drug use, he always was a doofus president, as well as his idiot son in my opinion. Through govenment programs, these people created an enormous propaganda machine that funded hundreds of thousands of government jobs, and crushed those who disaggreed.
Meanwhile, the chosen ones, continue to force their agenda on many foreign lands. American goaway hawks spray herbicides 100 ft. off the ground on the border of 2 countrys in South Ameica to destroy drug farms, real crop dusters spray 10 ft.off the ground, the US helicopters spray 100 ft. off the ground, allowing the toxic substance to drift into nearby villages and sicken the residents. In Costa Rica last week, I spoke with a local man who informed me he was a local grower, and the US military came to his country and destroyed a 1700 acre pot farm, he pointed across the bay to show me where. It has been obvious to me that the US government seems to think that they have the right to stick their nose in everyhbodys business, and condemn, imprison, harrass, and steal goaway from THEIR OWN CITIZENS over this issue ! How long will it be before American people convicted of simple possesion will bear tattoos on their arms ? the American public has been brainwashed, and are foolish enough, fo the most part, to beleive the propaganda thrust @ them. For an occasional pot smoker, the machine has told me, I am not worthy to make a living wage, live amongst you, nor thrive in a country that makes such a big deal over freedom. Well i gots news for you. The right wing politically correct white minority that aspire to political power, ARE THE ONES THAT HAVE RUN UP A STAGGERING DEBT, ANNOYED AND HARRASED AND DICTATED THEIR POLICY TO OTHER NATIONS FROM CANADA TO COSTA RICA AND BEYOND. You, who are ignorant of the actual effects of marijuana,you just go along with the whole program, right ? Do not argue, like the DEA, that thc content is higher than it was in the 60's, people don't drink gin like beer, it is a stupid argument. In a true and just world, drug tests would be given for the presence of thc, those that fail, should be denied their livlihood, or give affidavidits on their person attitude toward occassional marijuana use. We have been used, we are victims of a new prejudice, we are in fact "the new nigger". _________________ Kingfreeze
Joined: 07 May 2006 Posts: 102 Location: on the road in Texas
Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2007 1:18 pm Post subject:
YOUR WELCOME , glad it worked ,,,,, again
better living thru modern chemistry and deception !
3 can keep a secret if 2 are dead , so after i tell ya the secret, i have to kill ya ..nothing personal, just business ya know !!
the piss test can be decieved, given the proper amount of "cleantime" and certain chemical bonding agents
the hair test is the end all of testing, hair retains a "memory" of every toke tab or snort for the life of the individual.... _________________ happy nookie, cause ya cant have a good day with mad nookie !!!!!
fuxton T
Last edited by fuxton t spicotitz on Thu Apr 05, 2007 8:20 pm; edited 1 time in total
Joined: 29 Nov 2005 Posts: 303 Location: Richmond bc canada
Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2007 4:29 pm Post subject:
All you need up here is a doctors script and next thing you know, you are getting medicinal pot from the goverment, but it aint cheap and frankly you can find much better on the srteets, hell it doesnt even come close to the 60's pot,which at least had a bit of kick, and you should know that I beleive Canada took the best grown in Amsterdam again this year, we have the perfect climate for it and those wonderful streams and we have perfected home growing by miles,most small home growers who only grow for themselfs have it down to a sceince to produce the most available THC from any other growers in the world, and even more than most of the plants at one time were capable of producing, and besides you dont have to smoke it to test positive,just being around cannibis while it is being smoked will produce the same results, now had you had your hair tested that my friend would have given you a positive result no matter what you took.louis
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